I am estranged from my family. There’s no delicate way to say it, so I’mma just come right out with it; I haven’t seen my family in the better part of 4 years. There’s a lot of how and why that goes along with that, and maybe one day I’ll talk about it, though not likely. As a rule I don’t discuss what happened as all it will inevitably lead to is a hatchet fight. But it’s important that you know that for this next part; in a lot of ways my friends are my family. The man I call my brother was my best friend in High School, and I became his in our college years. And then one day, we became brothers. And his family is my family. Here’s a picture of us!
Aren’t they amazing?
I mention all this because for me in a lot of ways, my friends are my family… and recently someone who has been my friend for the better part of 16 years just… walked away. I don’t mean we drifted, I mean they told me in no uncertain terms that our friendship was over. I’d love to say what it was all about, but the truth of it is I’m not sure what it’s all about. They wouldn’t talk to me it was just… done.
And it’s been hard for me. Given how close I am to my friends — and I am very close. I’ve known Shrimptoast (she’s wearing the pink coat) for 15 years, we talk on the phone probably once every two weeks for the better part of two hours — to lose one without much in the way of notice, resolution, or understanding has been… devastating to put it lightly. However, something happened that turned that around for me.
This weekend, as you might have been aware depending on how much you follow us on facebook.com/BigandTallGaming, was filming weekend for the channel. Given that BigGunNumberOne lives 2 hours away, this is kind of how we roll. While we were enjoying our pizza and wings from Domino’s, and Ulfast was sipping on his beer we started talking about Mill Creek Camp –awesome place, you should check it out. I mentioned that I might be speaking there again this summer and Ulfast asked BGNO if he did camp at all. I interrupt people all the time, and I recognize it’s a problem, so before BGNO could say anything I proclaimed that he helped build the big stair case behind the lodge. Bashfully BGNO admitted that he built a lot of things, at which point Ulfast puts down his beer and leans forward.
Ulfast: “What’s your last name?” Ulfast has put his beer down, this conversation just got hella interesting.
BGNO: “[Last Name]”
Ulfast: “Wait… Are you K’s son?”
Ulfast: “I think we were friends when we were kids.”
At this point mothers are contacted to verify, and they confirm that these two were practically glued at the hip. Whenever they were at camp together they got into all sorts of shenanigans. They wandered off into the woods together, pranked people, built things — Ulfast’s mom, a nurse, actually dug a 6 inch splinter out of BGNO’s foot that he got playing on the rope-bridge at camp. It turns out that these two were basically long lost best friends. Of course upon this revelation BGNO let me know that I had been relegated to 2nd class citizen compared to Ulfast, at which point I pointed out that he might not be too quick to do that as clearly something very traumatic happened that they completely forgot about each other for the better part of 18 years — I think we decided on they killed someone, and that’s the real reason why you can’t cross the creek any more.
It’s a beautiful thing. While I had been mourning a friendship torn asunder, little did I know I had inadvertently started to stitch together long lost friends. Of course, I’ve always believed that love and friendship has it’s own gravity. Call it fate, God’s will, causality — whatever; people who are meant to be in each other’s lives will be in each other’s lives.
A lesson I’m trying to learn.
On a side note, I had a really great response to “A Conversation Worth Having” on our facebook page so I’m going to take a crack at making that a regular thing. So stay tuned for that!